Knocked Up
by Oxza
Summary: How does the cookie crumble, when Sasuke and Sakura are expecting a son in 9 months. We all know the ingredients to having a baby is love and partnership, but is it what its cut out to be?


She sat there on floor, with the carcasses splaying around her. Her fingers were stained red, and so were her clothes and lips.

Her eyes were ravened.

'Sakura'

Her eyes looked up to acknowledge the presence before her, his eyes worried and shaken,

'Drop it Sakura, you can't do this anymore.' He looked away to collect himself, 'This is sick Sakura.'

'Mmm, I don't think so', she slurped her lips and let the carcass fall to the floor, 'Sasuke,'

He looked up, and she continued, 'Why so serious.' She let out a giggle.

At that point he was worried, she had lost it, 'this addiction, its gotta stop, just look at you!' he cracked

And then he went at her, as she her slurp the red liquid that stained her.

He picked her up by the collar of her shirt, toes barely brushing the graveyard of a floor below her, 'Woman you better stop, this has gone for far too long-'

His lecture was cut off by her puckering lips, 'Like you don't have a _fetish_ for red liquids, to crunch through the flesh and be rejuvenated.'

His eyes narrowed, and then he cracked, 'Look lady, tomatoes are WAY better than your god damn strawberries, drop the god damn strawberry now!'

She tested the waters, 'Or what?'

'I'll quit my job at the factory, the very job that pays for your berries.'

'You wouldn't dare!'

'Hn'

She clenched her teeth, and he continued, 'You got me working like a dog, my wallet has been a shunned one, every time I get my paycheck suddenly, all the money is gone. And where does it go, STRAWBERRIES'

She rolled her eyes, 'Jeez you sound worse than a desperate housewife, god I'm paying the rent and the water, gas, and electricity bills, I like to now I got a comfort. I don't ask you for a new car, or a mansion, I just ask you to give me a small pleasure, strawberries.'

He let her down, and began to sarcastically laugh, '_small pleasure_. Sakura, for gods sakes, we have a separate fridge for your strawberries, and it's not a freaking' mini fridge it's a whole fridge! We put our groceries in the mini fridge, what does that say about your simple pleasure in life?'

'Huh, your tomatoes take up the whole pantry, and you import them, what the hell is that about.' She fought back.

He cringed, and clenched his fists, 'You women just don't understand what a man needs.'

'And I thought Naruto was through the roof with his ramen, listen here _buddy_ I have never enjoyed strawberries, I was always a cherry person. (She throws her hands in the air, and then points to her belly) but your _son_, is the one at fault here! Hey I don't like how possessive he is over just a fruit, you Uchiha's picked the weirdest obsessions I ever heard of.'

'I AM GOING TO DISOWN THAT CHILD!'

'YOU BURN IN HELL IF YOU TRY'

'Huh I see he's already a mama's boy, he'll never become a man.'

'Psh. Like you ever were.'

And she simply left him there to seeth, 'like I ever was' he mimicked, he walked to the couch and turned on the news. He always felt better after watching people suffering worse than him. As the news flicked on, the broadcast followed.

'_IT IS A FARMERS NIGHTMARE TO SEE WHAT HAS HAPPENED IN PERU; A LARGE EARTHQUAKE HAS HIT, ALONG WITH A TROPICAL STORM. THE SOIL FERTILITY HAS CHANGED COMPLETELY AND HAS CRASHED THE ECONOMY OF THE COUNTRY, WHICH PRIDES ITSELF ON ITS TOMATO CROPS. (__**SASUKES EYES TWITCH, as this is the country Sasuke imports his tomatoes from)**_

_THOUGH AT EVERY DARK TUNNEL THERE IS A LIGHT, THE COUNTRY HAS BEEN ABLE TO RESTORE ITS ECONOMY, BY HARVESTING ITS NEW CROP. STRAWBERRIES.-'_

Sasuke shook angrily, 'Tomatoes I will avenge you…but I must get stronger.'

Ring ring

'Mom..(sniff)'

'Sasuke-kun are you alright honey'

'No more Peruvian tomatoes.'

'Dear that's a shame, but I hear New Mexico has better tomatoes.'

'Really, Mom?'

He felt blessed and happy, 'Thanks Mom I feel so much better.'

'Of course dear, call me whenever you want, I'm here for you my baby'

And mood was then shattered, by the traitor once again, 'MAMA'S BOY'

Oh the nerve.


End file.
